1964-08-01 - Everything's Fine!
Summary: The librarian has noticed that Charles is out of sorts…
Related: If there are no related logs, put 'None', — please don't leave blank!
Theme Song: None
karma xavier 

It is the library, so it'd make sense the librarian is here. Xi'an sits behind a desk, with a little placcard in front of her that reads 'REFERENCE'. She's dressed in a brown pencil skirt and a yellow blow, nothing that is too tight or too revealing. A modest woman is she. There's a book in front of her and she slowly pages through it, seeming to read for pleasure rather than any actual research purpose. She's surely not taking notes!

Professor Charles Xavier, graduate of Oxford, has an… unusual approach to stress. Or in this case, personal issues. Specifically, he's riding around the ladder for the bookshelves, zipping back and forth and sorting out all the books to be just perfect. And quite likely driving any sane librarian crazy in the process. Back. And Forth. Back. And Forth. Then, he pauses, finding the book he's looking for and sliding down the ladder, book cradled protectively as he lands on the floor with a solid *thunk* with his feet.

It's probably why Xi'an is so invested in this particular work of fiction. Distraction. Because unlike Pietro, you can't just scream at the founder and owner of the library you're working in. When he finally comes down, Xi'an does set that book down, and looks up to the man, with a smile. "Finally find what you're looking for, professor?" she asks, her words tinged with a French accent. Nice and safe question!

Charles gives Xi'an a wry expression, "Not really, but I think it's something that will work for now. The Iliad." He gets a bit of an apologetic smile, "Sorry if I was distracting you, I… well." The rumor mill at the school operates faster than telepathy, after all, and he just shrugs a bit. "Anyway, thought this suited the mood I was in."

"Well, sadly, we only have books in the library…" Xi'an murmurs out, with a tight smile. She then takes a breath, sets her book down on the desk, and then pushes herself to stand. She takes a moment to run hands over her skirt and flatten it out, then starts over to Charles. "Is there anything I might be able to help you find?" she asks, a touch uncertain. "Perhaps something… that isn't a book? I am a bit more… adaptive… than the library," she offers.

Charles smiles, "Well, thank you Xi'an… but I'll be alright in time. It's just… well." He looks down at the book in his hands, "You'd think it gets easier, but it never really seems to. I'm not sure age brings wisdom so much as perspective, though right now both seem a bit lacking."

There's a tight smile on the Viet woman's face. "I have… seen many friends feeling equally… lost," she decides, choosing words carefully and delicately. "I've no experience of my own, of course, so…" She gives a faint laugh, then a wave. "I still am told I am a good listener," she decides. "If you wanted to talk."

Charles laughs a bit, "Well, after Moira, Gabrielle, and now Emma… I guess it's the part and parcel of being a dreamer." Yes, he does have that romantic streak, which can bite him more often than not, but at least he's fatalistic about it, "I mean, I know I shouldn't be upset and this happens, but… well, the head knows things but the heart's going to ignore it, if that makes sense."

"Sit, please?" Xi'an asks, assuming the man hasn't already. She gives a little gesture, though she'll not take a seat unless he does. "I don't know why you think you should not be upset. I would be upset, were I you," she says. "Does not matter how many loves have been lost… they are still just that."

Charles hadn't sat down yet, but he does so, giving Xi'an a wry smile, "Oh, I wouldn't argue that point, and I am upset. It's just… well, you know that, especially for me, giving a little too much into that emotion can be dangerous." The problems of being one of the most powerful telepaths on the planet, if you aren't careful everyone knows you're upset.

Soon as he sits, Xi'an joins him. She sits next to him, back straight, knees together. The image of a proper French woman! Which is what she is, sorta. She watches her friend/boss, and gives a small dip of her head. "Of course," she murmurs out. "I… imagine… I would want to be alone in the woods somewhere. Or drunk," she decides, with a faint smile. Because Karma, too, might be dangerous in that condition. "Might I ask you… a personal question, Charles…?" she asks, using the first name instead of title or last. A personal conversation!

Charles grins a bit, "Of course, Xi'an, ask away. Though I make no promises on giving you an answer." He chuckles, "But, I will do the best that I can." He looks at her somewhat curiously, tilting his head a bit.

Xi'an bobs her head, and then takes a moment to consider. She idly smooths her skirt as she does, letting the thoughts roll around and congeal, before she looks back up. "With… Professor Frost…" She starts, and then pauses, and considers a moment. "With her, and with Gabrielle, and with Moira… any of them… did you ever… look into their minds? Feel their emotions? Read their thoguhts?" she asks, her voice faint. "Without… or with… them knowing?"

Charles blinks, "What, no!" He shakes his head, "I mean, Emma and I had a deep rapport because we communicated on that level more often that not, it was… liberating, in a way." He then smiles, actually blushing a bit, "Tempting as it might have been, I never would have violated that for any of them. It would be rude and… frankly, it's nice to be surprised in a relationship." A wry expression at that, "In this latest case I wouldn't have minded NOT being surprised, though." Though, that's one way he's different than 616 Xavier apparently.

"Well… I did say without or with permission," Xi'an says, a little defensively. "I just… it seems like it would be… that. Liberating. To know what you feel, and what another feels, rather than having to… speak it," she murmurs out. "And… even then. The… temptation has been there. For me. I never have!" she says, quickly. "But… there… have been a few times where I think 'what if?'… And asking aloud can ruin everything. Just knowing would… be safer. Easier…" she murmurs, and then gives a faint shrug. "You know I am not very… ah. Good… with it." Telepathy, she means. "But if you ever wanted to 'talk' like that," she says, with air quotes. "We can. You've been in my mind before. Your presence is always welcome."

Charles smiles at Xi'an, calming a bit, "Sorry, it just sounded like… well, I mean, they knew I had that ability, but that wasn't really the reason. Or at least, the spoken reason. And really, Gabrielle wanted to stay in Israel, while I came back to America, so." He shrugs a little, then looks at Xi'an, and smiles, "Well, I could give you some tutoring if you wanted, of course. I wouldn't mind that level of communication. It's… well, I hadn't thought about it that much, until I was with Emma. She was… quite exceptional with that." He smiles faintly again, thinking back on some better times.

"There is very much I need to work on, Charles. And right now, acquiring a car is at the front of my mind," Xi'an replies, with a smile. "And Dizzy-.. Julie is going to help. She'll work on repairing one for me, quite cheap," she says. Then a breath, and and she dips her head. "Then reach out to me. Let me… see how you are feeling. I won't block you out," she says. Of course, whether or not she could… well.

Charles hmms, and nods, "Alright." He smiles a bit at the mention of Dizzy, then he reaches out with his mind, linking with Xi'an as he definitely feels… not upset, necessarily. It's a melancholy feeling surrounding him, though, as if he sometimes has the doubts about whether his Dream can be real, preying on that fierce core of optimism that he has at his center.

While Charles' core may be optimism, Xi'an's is sorrow. So much death and defeat in her life. Of course, it is not something that causes her to lie down and give up. Rather, it is what pushes her forward. Prevent that suffering from happening to others. Keep up the fight. Keep what few things she has left. But over that, and prevading her mind, is optimism. The small woman's eyes fall shut as she feels that presence, and a soft smile crosses her lips. Hello, Charles, comes across through her mind. You were here for me when I needed it most… and I will be here for you, always. You know that? she asks, words echoing through her mind. With it, that sense of loyalty and commitment can be felt so keenly.

Charles smiles slightly, speaking mind to mind directly, "I never had any doubts about that, Xi'an. Thank you." He looks somewhat refreshed in the link, Xi'an's hope helping refuel his, as he has been somewhat dismal the past few days, "And you know I'd always be here for you, should you ever need me." He means that too, as he's always had loyalty for his students, regardless of where they find themselves later.

"I know you did not doubt. But I also know it helps to hear," Xi'an replies, the words echoing in her mind. As she sits, she starts to relax. Eyes close, a soft smile on her lips, her shoulders start to slump. Not expect her perfectly poised seat on the couch, now. "And I want you to know that you are a good man. I cannot understand what these other women are thinking. If I were ever with a man…" And she doesn't need to finish that thought. Their minds are linked. Charles can feel as her whole mind blushes red with embarassement. He can also feel the rest of that sentence. If she were ever with a man, it would be Charles Xavier.

Charles laughs softly, "Flatterer." He means that sincerely, and is touched by that. After all, he knows her preferences, and he smiles, "Xi'an, I am honored by that, but I know what you truly want, and I know you'll find happiness someday." He smiles, letting the rest remain unsaid as he then shrugs a bit, "It's the way life is, but that's why we have to keep going. There's a better future on that horizon."

Xi'an is blushing not just in her mind but very plainly on her cheeks. They show red, and she looks away, as if she can hide it from him. As if they were speaking like normal folk. Of course, at those next words - or thoughs - a darkness prevades the woman's mind. There is only the clouds of despair on this horizon, Professor. She doesn't need respond, he can feel it. The doubt. The frustration. The hopelessness. Xi'an attempts to push it all back, and to let the sun shine again. "You be hopeful about the future for both of us, Charles. I'll be hopeful for the present. Deal?"

Charles nods, "That, I can do Xi'an, I promise." He smiles, and steps back from the link, placing a supportive hand on Xi'an's shoulder as he snaps back into the corporeal realm, giving her a warm expression, even if he is also blushing a little, "Thank you, I needed that."

Xi'an's eyes remain closed for a moment after the link breaks. She sucks in a breath, long and deep, then blows it out. Eyes finally open again, and she looks over. "Any time, Charles," she says, smiling sweetly, and a touch sheepishly. Then she leans in, and presses a kiss to the man's cheek. Cheek kiss delivered, she stands back up. "And now, if you're doing doing laps around my library-" Nevermind that it's his library "-I need to get back to work."

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