1965-04-03 - Grand Theft Sectional Sofa
Summary: JP wrangles VItale for a fun outing: Explining why he's beat to shit, and stealing all of Vitale's brother's furniture and putting it all in CLint's apartment with absolutely no one's knowledge or consent. Like April 1st all month long apparently
Related: If there are no related logs, put 'None', — please don't leave blank!
Theme Song: None
vitale jp 

JP willed his car to life with a roar of that monster engine in the 64 GTO, Jeanne d'Arc in the garage and beeped twice to give Vitale the alert that JP was on his way down. Soon to follow were heavy boots, his, down the concrete and metal steps. Apparently life's been interesting and JP had enough pride to not bother hiding the blackened ribs he was pulling the Sassy Saguaro Restaurant t-shirt over. Did JP know what a saguaro even was? Who knew. It went with the shiner on the side of his face. Someone tuned him up real good. Still he was showered, wet black hair a glorious mess that suited him, and with a grin he waggled his eyebrows and let the car quiet down. "You get tha' truck?" Yeah because that's what Vitale wanted to talk about- the fucking moving van. "We got a pretty good window to do this this mornin."

JP looks like shit, and not the fun kind of shit, the big steaming pile kind, that's been sitting around fermenting for awhile. It doesn't take a genius to guess that Vitale sees red the moment he watches JP pull a shirt over more than just /slightly/ bruised ribs. "Jean-Pierre Bonaventure." Vitale practically growls at JP as he shortens the distance between them quickly. "What the hell happened to you? Why didn't you call me?" He doesn't even bother with asking this time, it was clear that JP hadn't earned any of this from a night of really rough sex, he grabs JP's chin to tilt his head to the side and getting a good look at the shiner on his eye as it starts to fade and replace itself on JP's own.

Vitale holds out his hand for JP's to join it, but he's clearly not asking so much as demanding with the illusion that JP had a choice as he releases JP's chin. "Alright, give me the rest. Who the hell did this to you?" Yeah, no, the truck is not at all what Vitale wants to talk about.

JP held up a finger and helpfully corrected (because he was helpful), "Marius." What? "You left out mah' middle name. You gon' put the heat on me is Jean-Pierre Marius Bonaventure. Continue." Oh the balls on this asshole!

His head tilted up withthe pull of Vitale's hand, the dulled throb in his face flaring momentarily as it pulls away from him to Vitale's fingers. "Did a job. went bad. Guy didn' wanna pay me so…we had some words. Came home slept it off an' then got yelled at by Elmo when he broke in and changed out mah' peas." Aaaah the joys of owning a bag of frozen peas. It might be ALL he owned but it was a solid investment. "So yesserday we go back, give the guy a talk aaaaan I Think he in the hospital right now. Cops were comin. I dunno. I didn' stay. Stuck em good a couple times in the leg tho'. Elmo lit em up a bit. It did no' real' slow em down. Impressive really…. putain de chien galeux…" Yeah he had some words. He squint and his heart sank faintly an' said, "I didn' call you a- cause I wasn' dyin, and two you ain' mah bitch for whenever life has no fuckin hiccup. Sides, we were meetin up t'day. Is fine. We all alive another day. But tha' Foreman lay hands on anyone else again? eeeeh he won' be." Job done JP slapped Vitale on the shoulder and pulled him into a hug briefly. "Merci, mo ami. NOW…" He let him go and started to walk outside a bit of a bounce back. "We talk in tha' truck. We got us a …time… thing to stick to."

Vitale pulls his hand away to slap JP on the cheek lightly when he corrects him while Vitale is reaming him. The light sting wouldn't even have time to settle into the accidentally appointed Bossman's skin before it fades into Vitale's instead. "Jean-Pierre Marius Bonaventure, don't correct me while I'm yelling at you." He grouches back at him.

"JP-" Vitale starts but JP's yanking him into a brief hug. Too brief, and not enough skin to skin contact for Vitale to do anything about the real injury in his side, and he feels like JP knew that. He had to. The sweet /pain in the ass/ didn't want Vitale to take it for unselfish reasons this time. Vitale all but lunges for JP to grab him about the waist. "Uh-uh. No. We're not doing a damn thing until you let me take care of your ribs, Jean-Pierre /Marius/ Bonaventure." He is /hissing/. "Come here. Stay still. I can /take/ it, JP."

JP lurched as he was tackled by the scrappy Italian and at the insistence, and possibly only the use of his middle name did he trot to a stop. Force of habit surrendered to demand with both hands in the air slowly lacing fingers behind his head with a derisive sigh left him without any other protest. How he was running around as chipper as he was proved he could put on quite a damn show and it took a little more than a second to fix. The greaser's head hung defeated in his protest to safeguard Vitale's right to not be treated as a band-aid but hey, the man chose his path this time. There was freedom in that. Less flippantly he offered, "Merci beaucoup. NOW… we ride?" His arms lowered in their own time but he waited to make sure V was alright before they hit up the moving van. Yeah yeah it could wait a second.

The entire team was made up of stubborn men and it somehow worked. While Vitale understands that JP is just trying to show him that it was always his choice and that being the team band-aid wasn't the only reason he was here, Vitale still wasn't going to let him waltz off with battered ribs, especially when they planned on doing heavy lifting all day today. One hand gets quite friendly, shoving JP's shirt out of the way to press against the bare skin of his side, right against the injury. The other moves to tilt JP's head back up as Vitale presses his forehead against JP's own. "We're a family, dumbass, I take care of you, you take care of me." He says seriously, as he only winces slightly as the injury seeps from JP's skin to his own. The hand that had tilted JP's chin up, drops to the other man's shoulder, clinging for a second at an attempt to stave off any other reaction to the pain, he really does try not to make people feel bad about giving him their pain.

It fades, it takes a moment but it does and when it does, Vitale gives JP a /proper/ hug. "Yeah, we can go, now that you're not nursing /black/ ribs when you want to go do heavy lifting, asshole." He teases lightly.

JP didn't give anyone anything. He was robbed of it at guilt-point! He really couldn't argue when his guys started throwing around reason like a grenade. Hell even JP had to laugh at that. The hug got a wobble back and the gearhead grinned, "Maybe I wanna watch everyone else work. Ya ever think of that?" The grin got wider as if the real joke was JP not sticking his nose into something was its own miracle. "I wanna drive." And as he slapped the hood of the truck, well it was his now. "Dibs. Also shotgun" Because he could drive from there and sometimes he liked being a brat like that. "So tell em bout this brother a'yours. Who he is? I mean we we got'drive it from Brooklyn t' Queens. Might as well get the gritty on it."

"You're gonna drive it while I sit driver side? You sure you're the oldest brother? Actin' the part of a brat." Vitale teases, glad to see that there's a pep in JP's step now with the lack of detrimental injury to his side. JP was going to be the death of Vitale, not because he'll be pulling injury off of him, but because JP was going to make Vitale worry himself into a heart attack he wouldn't recover from.

He rounds to the driver's side and puts one hand on the wheel, more for show than anything. JP said he wanted to drive, Vitale wasn't going to do anything to fight him on it. "What you want to know? As all of my brothers are, Giovanni is a pompous, arrogant dick."

JP replied knowledgeably, "Who you think they learn from. Besides, leadin from the front is important. Sides what's the fun of havin any sorta skill if you can' fuck wit' people wit' em?" The doors opened for them like a valet. JP set himself up all comfortable like and tuned in getting a feel for the gears, the handling, and the weight of the trailer with it. Off they did go. "So we don' like em. He live another day but he insured up the ass so go nuts. He got kids or dog I need know about?" Both eyebrows arched curiously as he fished around for his cigs and a lighter.

"Nah. He's in a committed relationship with his hair gel, though, so don't touch that. I'm pretty sure he gets it imported from somewhere. As far as brothers go, Giovanni isn't the worst. Ignacio is a real mean piece of work, Giovanni looks like a marshmallow in comparison. Giovanni just cares about himself and only himself. He might have kids, but none he knows about, he's got a new girl every time I stomach going to visit him." Vitale replies, leaning back against the seat. "Most of his stuff does have his initials on it, though, so your friend is gonna know you stole it." But he has a feeling that any of friend of JP's wouldn't be surprised.

JP snorted in amusement, "He better know I stole it. Ya know,"The Cajun looked to his friend here thoughtfully, "I like to think anyone can buy something. To take it shows cunnin, 'nitiative, and a certain je ne sais quoi about it that shows you realy put in some effort ya know?" Yeah. There we go. JP nodded happy with that explanation and grinned to himself. "Lettum know he gets t'benefit off the lack of the 'have's." Looking back from teh window to Vitale he shrugged. "He ain' got merde t' his name but a mattress an' some cookware. Someone took e'rythin from this guy… ain' right." Maybe it was his own recent losses that spurred this act of charity or maybe it was just some new puzzle to keep his mind occupied. Either way Gio was gonna have a very bad day, and the government's favourite pain in the ass was finally due to have a pretty damned decent one. "Shit he find me t'ask it'll be worth it. Sides. My friend. I can call em whatever I wan'." IT did seem to be their way.

"I don't think that there is any lack of care in having stole something for someone instead of buying it for them, JP. I wasn't saying that, I just didn't know if you wanted to steal the stuff with 'G.D' on it. My brother can buy it all again. It might even take him a week to find out we stole from him at all. Like I said, he's got a different girl every week. He's hardly home at all." He admits. "It's all black, the majority of his furniture, the couch. All his plates and shit have intricate engraving but look like they haven't been used. Severin and I broke some of it in when I was trying my hand at being romantic one night."

JP squint to Vitale as he regaled the story. "Only some?!" Another sigh and a woeful shake of his head. "Ya know, you spen' all your life growin up with a guy you think you can trus' em to figure out how to break all the dishes. Is like he's housebroken now or something. Either way shit with initials is funny and somethin' tells me anyone tryin to take it back? Merde, tha' be funnier. How much further out we got?"

Vitale laughs hard at JP's shock that Severin knows how to use dishes. "Now, that's not fair of you, JP, I'll have you know that your brother had to teach /me/ how to cook. Though, I might have pretended to be less knowledgeable than I was in order to get him closer, but you knew your brother could cook." He teases. "Maybe I'm a bad influence on him, soon he'll be drinking his beer with his pinky up the more I work him over."

"Couple miles, turn left up here. The apartment building that looks like only God himself could afford it, that's where he lives."

JP looked confused and grinned, "Quoi?" This amused and cheered him up greatly. "Vitale you crack me up. Ain' none of what I said at all have anythin' t'do with food in the slightest. Sev better be drinkin no beer with no pinky out though. I'll fuckin bite it. He' maul my face, sure, but I'm a bite em." He pulled up not to the front but the service side where there'd be a freight elevator. "You sure he ain' home? Well if he is you doin alla talkin." With that he got out of the truck and followed Vitale to get up to the place through service halls. Innocuous that.

"If he's home, I'll come up with something. Tell him I'm trying to recruit you or pretend you're my boyfriend." Because admitting he was in a relationship with another man would go over very well with another mobster. "I'm, like, at least 98 percent sure he isn't home." Vitale gets out of the car and jerks his head forward to lead JP to the elevator. "We're going all the way up, Gio has the entire top floor."

JP shook his head. "I'd lose credibility and likely get arrested. We need a chair, not t'get the chair." He grinned to Vitale. Something about his very existence inciting lawbreaking pleased him. The whole top floor grabbed him by surprise. "We need like a key t'get up or somethin or you got it?" Getting out of the elevator there was a low whistle. "Meeerde, V. This… nicer I think than I ever seen… I think ever." One could veritably see the little dollar signs roll up in his eyes like a cartoon. He whispered something in French close enough to Italian that Vitale would catch something about 'pockets not deep enough'.

Vitale pulls a key out of his pocket and tosses it back and forth between one hand and the other in answer to JP's question about a key. "Also, that was a joke, the boyfriend part. Though, Severin and I already live dangerously with him pretending to be my dog so he can spend the night. I would never tell them that I'm with another man. It's not something I could say without receiving a healthy dose of corrective therapy at the hands of my father and I'm just not interested in any of that any time soon."

The entire top floor indeed. They walk into a large living room, a nice, sleek black leather couch in front of the nicest looking tv one could purchase in the sixties, beside it was a large dining room table, large as in long, with enough chairs along it to host a small militia. The kitchen looks like it hasn't been touched. The place smells like it hasn't been touched by anything but a cleaning lady in a month. "He's got embroidered napkins in the kitchen, made from silk."

JP nodded slowly, "Yeaaaah let's leave all the zappin t'Sparkplug." He looked around and stretched his arms to either side waltzing through there with a spin. Oooooh he was having too much fun with this! Yup, he went right for Gio's room to pick through the finery that wasn't 'heirloom'. "Tres bon! OH he have good taste, V." Nope, no one home. There was the sound of hangers moving. No shame this one. None. Nooooone. First thing was first: little things in a box and then box on the couch. He eyebrow waggled to Vitale with a grin. "Is like Christmas." Now would be the time to stop him if anyone's gonna try.

If JP was waiting for Vitale to give a damn, it wasn't going to happen. Steal all you want from his older brother, not like his older brother had ever stopped to give a damn about Vitale all the years that he was being victimized by their father. "What, you're taking his clothes too? Your friend the same size as Gio?" The bedroom is so extravagant, the bed is far larger than it has any right to be with a tall black iron canopy design, red curtains to pull around the outsides, a red and black blanket with G.D embroidered into it with fancy cursive font and golden thread. There was an expensive watch on the bedside table. The bedside table was, of course, made of fancy wood. Everything in there reeked of money.

Vitale looks beneath the bed and pulls out a duffel bag tossing it to JP. "Put whatever little stuff you want in there."

JP took the duffel bag and looked back to the room nodding a thanks to Vitale handing him a duffel all the while wearing Gio's suit coat. "Tu frere mus' get a ton of ass with bank like this. Is crazy. Hey you remember that guy that came into the bar that tine when you was all up on my brother's face?" There was a wry grin there. JP set part of that up deliberately though he'd never admit to his role in any of that. "Lobster guy? He gettin the furniture. Loooong story. But you seen his shoulders? Kinda insane for lil Deigo coat. Me? Fit me kinda nice. This way if I gotta go back t'court I' be prepared. Or scaring people. Some reason me dressin like a square terrifies people. Funny." He shoved a few more things into the goodie bag and nodded to Vitale. "Le's not overstay the welcome yeah? Case is a rare day."

Vitale laughs a little at that. "Not gonna lie to you, JP, we all do. Or well, I used to, kinda tied down right now. Got myself someone I really like a lot, but yeah, you flash a little paper, and you can just about have yourself anyone you want. I've smelled like money since I was born, was just a matter of waiting 'til I knew how to use it before I started rolling in it too. Boys, Girls, anyone will go home with you when you're wearing a suit that cost more than their entire house. And between me and you, I think Gio might take home a boy or two every now and then."

"Hey now, being 'on your brother's face' was what got us all here, wasn't it?" Vitale says with a click of his tongue. "Mm, I remember him. Tall, blond, buff and gorgeous right? I mean, I was distracted by your brother, but I remember him. You two.. going with each other? I thought you was going with Elmo?" Brooklynese for 'I thought you and Elmo were dating?'

"You don't want to take the couch? We can get it down the elevator. I helped him move it in, it'll fit."

JP laughed and gave Vitale's shoulder a squeeze amused at him getting moon-eyed over his brother, Sev. "Yeah, I bet. Trus' me I'm among the many whose temporary but total loyalties are assured on the short-term. Cash sings man. And she sing sooooo pretty. But yeah, We takin the couch. Uhhhh yeah I think the whole sectional'll fit. Ooh! and that sculpture lamp thing. I'm swapin the lava lamp out f'it." He didn't elaborate on what Lava Lamp he was talking about because Gio wouldn' dare decorate with one.

Looking up he blinked and looked totally confused for a moment. Deadpan he shook his head, "Nah, I only met em that once. We ain' talked since." A statement that made today's voyage make near no sense, but apparently to JP it did. "Elmo… 's my business partner. I dunno. Things is what they is. I don' think too much on em." He pause and really thought about that, brow furrowing. "Ti'be honest up til couple weeks ago? I was still planning on movin back, marry Mozelle and e'rythin work out and now…" He paused and looked thoughtful for a moment before that passed entirely, "Well we ain't." His hand circled in a motion for Vitale to pick up his end. "Grab you' end, ami."

Vitale bites his lower lip at the knowledge that JP had been thinking about leaving. It's not as if it doesn't make sense. Mozelle had his baby, why wouldn't he want to spend his life with her? Vitale had always told himself if he ever messed up while he was drunk, forgot to throw the rubber on and knocked some poor bird up, he'd marry her. He's pretty sure that's how his sister wound up with Santino, her awful husband. He'd be good to her though, so good. Raise that kid right, not the way his father had. So, it's not that it doesn't make sense, that that would be JP's plan in the end, but it doesn't make the flutter of anxiety that JP wanted to go back and away fade from Vitale's chest immediately.

Also, knowing that JP wanted to marry the lady and had that dream dashed before his eyes doesn't leave Vitale unaffected either. Poor JP. He bends to pick up his end of the couch. They were doing heavy lifting, the perfect time to have a heart to heart. "JP, that shit's rough, pal and I am not going to tell you that I know how you feel exactly because I don't, but all of that's rough and it's okay to be down. We'll pick you up. I got you. Elmo got you. Sev got you. We love you, man." He tells JP between grunts.

JP set his jaw with a determined look hefting his end of the couch up. Good thing trouble keeps one in prime shape. "Yeah, it's been…. a thing, ya know?" He was talking about it? huh. He was making the casual attempt on passing trying something new. "we're got things to do here though. And…yeah. You do got got me. I got y'all too. Don' worry, jes….figuring myself and what our next target is is all. Might have to go back after the asshole that tuned me up…He I'm worried about, but today? today we scare the hell outta two people. today a good day, mon ami."

"I know you got me. You got all of us, Bossman but we also got you. It's alright you're trying to figure yourself out right now, JP, you got your whole life to do it, you don't have to rush into anything." He tells him as they muscle the couch into the elevator to take it down to the truck. "You can also talk about it, all of it, whenever you want, no one here is gonna think any less of you if you do, if you break down, lord knows I've done enough of it."

JP paused waiting for the freight elevator to come up. He paused looking to Vitale. He had a REALLY good point. "Yeah… guess I do got mah' whole life'figure it out don' I?" Like that was a new perspective than he'd thought of. well… merde. He shook his head though, "Naaaah I don' break down. Make me waste too much time puttin m'self back t'gether. Apparently My … like… what 'chu call em, coping? Is making stupid decisions that let me meet interesting people. Still… this' fun though. And… I do 'preciate the help. Wait til ya see this place. No one that brings another guy a lobster to street fight deserves bein looted… n'er you mind I looted em too. We're unlootin now though so it don' count like that. Mmm? There's rules."

"We can loot all my brothers, they're awful people, JP, make whatever rules you like. If you stole /my/ furniture to give to this guy, I wouldn't even care. Hell, I'd probably help you pick out the best sets to decorate his place with." Vitale teases, brushing over the fact that by telling JP he'd be cool with him looting his place means that he lumps himself in with the category 'terrible people who deserve to have their shit stolen'. "I'd like for you to stop making stupid decisions that get you hurt, JP."

JP sighed and punched the button for the loading dock to take them down. Yeah… yeaaaaah he probably ought to. He nodded slowly and shrugged. "Oui. Oui I do. last time it was … kind a lil too close. But also like… I dunno. I think we all go t'what we know. Familiar, even bad? I dunno easier to navigate from. It's… a shit idea. You ain' wrong, but… I promise if I know somehtin a shit decision I'll call or somethin firs'. Mmm?" It was his compromise. He grinned and added, "Or just keep breaking into people's apartments an' redecorating on em."

"Well, it's almost just as being addicted to a drug, buddy, or a raging alcoholic, you're still hurting yourself in the process. No one here wants that. I'll take care of you, I'll always fix you up, but I might kick your ass after for the trouble too. Then heal you again, because I'd feel bad." He says, with a small smile. "And then your brother's gonna kick my ass for kicking your ass and Elmo's going to kick everyone's ass, it'll be a nightmare. So to avoid all of that, you could just behave yourself."

JP snickered and nodded. They hit the ground floor and wrestling things into the van looking super professional doing so. Yaaaaas this was going so so well! "Yeaaaaah I dunno I met anyone angrier than Elmo man. He's gonna pop a blood vessel in his head or somethin. Heeee need t'calm down or something. But… yeah. Lookin t'…do… something else. I dunno. We'll work it out. Survivin what we do, yeah?" Because if anyone knew that acutely it was Vitale. He got what he was puttin down.

"I don't know that he's angry as much as feisty and cares about you intensely." Vitale teases with a wink. "We'll get the shop up and running and you'll have plenty to occupy your mind and your hands. If you get yourself banged up in the shop, I won't kick your ass, that's completely allowed." Vitale promises as the bell on the elevator rings to let them know they're on the bottom floor once again. He picks up his side of the couch and nods for JP to take his. "And, stealing shit from jackasses to decorate your friend's place, that's also something you're completely allowed to get hurt doing."

JP grinned almost stupidly, but the jailbird had pride in being allowed to get dinged fucking with Hawkeye's apartment. "Yeah Only one person keep me from doin it and aaaah he hasn't yet…soooo fuck with the apartment we shall. Sides. Is like… one a them moral implat thingies." Imperatives, Jp. Imper- oh never mind. He tried. "Elmo and I… had words on that. Look, I made em a promise, My job at the end of the day is t'be functional to DO the damn job. I get it I get it. I'm not used to someone not my PO keepin tabs on me. Look, it's fine. Rule one is don' get yourself into a situation ya'all can't get outta. But… noted." It didn't take long for the two of them to pack up the last of the couches and start heading across town. "How come I feel like we expectin flashin lights any minute?"

Vitale laughs a little at that question. "Probably because you're always feeling like you should be expecting flashing lights, you convict." Vitale teases touching the steering wheel when they join each other back in the truck. "No one is coming to get us, JP, when Giovanni does come home, he's not calling the cops, he's going to think one of us did it. Like, one of his brothers. He'll probably accuse Iggy of doing it first." He smiles and then the smile breaks into a laugh, in the classic style of a little brother that's about to get away with everything. "You still gonna drive? You know where tall, blond beefcake lives, I do not."

JP grinned imagining all the chaos. "Vitale, I'm so fuckin proud of you for just bein you without apology. I gotta pull everyone else's damn teeth t'do this. The honesty is noted. And yeah I think I crash the place enough t'find it from the moon a'most." How long had JP been fucking with this dude's apartment? A while it seemed.

They drove across the neighborhood until finally he parked out front. "This where havin one 'them 'movers' like m' papa come in real handy. Right. So through t'front door it is. He that one on the fourth floor corner." Nice building all in all. With some finagling JP made his way up the fire escape to touch the windows and 'tune' to them to see if he could sense anyone inside from their vantage. He sliiiiiiid back down and nodded. "We star' with sofa since 'went in last and head on up. You guide it up, I'll shove." Which not that he could take Sam in an arm wrestlin contest but he could wear some bigger duds down quite a bit. Finally up to the 4th's floor his hand brushed the door and it took a moment to unlock itself, and swing open on it's own.

Clint's apartment looked like it was waiting to be moved into but for a couple dishes in the sink, a punching bag, a workbench with a funny burning smell, and a crate with a lava lamp and a paper there. That was it. Normal people had….stuff! This man had no stuff. He had divots in the carpet where stuff once was but that was as close as it got.

"What? I'm their little brother. I love causing chaos and making them beat each other up while I sneak off with their favorite toys." Unapologetically him is quite correct, Vitale didn't hide at all how much he was enjoying the idea of causing so much strife. "You got little brothers, you know we're all evil little things. Yours likes to turn into a crocodile and scare you."

Vitale has no problem with helping JP lug the couch up the stairs to the apartment but when they get inside, Vitale is dismayed by just how bare it is. Well this just wouldn't do! "We should have taken the bed!" He says, distraught. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his wallet. "I'm leaving him some money. It's /my/ money, JP." He says pointedly as if he suspects JP's going to argue with him. "Just a little. I'll… I'll.. stick it in his fridge, that's somewhere he's gonna look when he gets home but ain't no one else gonna. I'll just leave a little."

JP got the furniture moved in and noticed… the note that read: 'Spaghetti in the fridge'. A half grin eased onto the crazy Cajun's face and he went over and opened the fridge CAREFULLY cause… well there was a blue sploch on the counter that matched the blue that was stuck to his hand for like four days. This… this would take some finagling. "Vitale, we gonna be a while, but after this, we go pick up some Chinese food and pay em back. Wing Sing's pretty good."

Laying hands on the fridge his vision unfocused a bit getting a feel for all the ways it could be used. Finally JP stood all the way around the corner and willed the door to open on its own keeping himself out of the blast radius. He laid face up on the kitchen floor with his head in the fridge trying to see if anything under the bowl was rigged to pop like the squib under the beer. Neeewp. Standing up he found that… odd. There had to be a trick to this. He went for a fork and paused starting that process aaaaall over again. It was a lot of effort for a bowl of spaghetti that was absolutely in no way sabotaged.
JP's social life was complicated without human involvement.

Yeah. Day 15? Total win.

Before they headed out JP did one last thing, after determining that it was the workbench that smelled of burning. The f- Ah well. The same could be said of his garage at times. Who was he to judge when his business partner constantly made things smell of ozone. He rinsed his bowl out and put it away because he wasn't a barbarian and his mama raised him right AND… be cause it'd make Clint look in the fridge.

When all was said and done there was a beautiful black leather sectional and a legit dining room table that would seat four with chairs and a coffee table. JP took the crate because it was a way useful crate. He wanted the lava lamp but oddly left it exactly where it was in the room but on said new coffee table now. Why he didn't take it he explained to no one. He had his reasons. So pretty. That thing could hypnotize anyone for hours. But right now? Right now he had to go all the way to China town, get the kung pao, come back, put THAT in the fridge and get back to the garage.

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