1965-04-05 - The Amazing Mister Lambert
Summary: Jebediah meets Lambert and is absolutely awestruck.
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lambert jebediah 

As the weather warms, Saganaki is ever more open. It is quite tightly spaced inside - there are people there now, being served by Kai and assisted by Sam and Marcy. So some of the folk have spilled out to the back courtyard, out here. There is a large and brand new blackboard up, with a selection of specials, one of which is of course saganaki. Added there are other terms - fasolakia and baked potatoes, horiatiki salad, warmed olives with lemon juice, dolmades avgolemono. The lamb platter appears to pretty much be the most common thing that people pick.

Off by one of the little evening lanterns in the corner is a scale-faced woman with her companion, a man who has caucasian features but onyx skin. Out here, the unusual and the strange come to eat without having to be concerned about other matters. They are assisted by the chef who moves in and out of the kitchen, the back door open to the elements. Lambert is a rather rotound young man, sprighly and light on his feet, with a chef's uniform and a cap that his woolly hair is pushed back under. As are his goaty ears and horns.

Jebediah rarely comes here to eat. It's just where he found Morbius once and since then, it's where he always comes to find Morbius. Jebediah is a slender little thing, usually hands covered in burns and wearing clothing that's been preowned by brothers so much bigger than he ever had been, though, lately, when he comes to visit Morbius, he tries to dress slightly less like a homeless person. The restaurant was always a source of wonder to Jebediah because there were always people in here with odd skin textures and neat mutations. It's not a restaurant so much a source of constant inspiration for his sketchbook and it's the place he gets to meet with Morbius, so it's usually the best part of his entire week.

He comes in tonight, excitedly bouncing in like he always does but there's no Morbius in sight, which leaves an unmistakable pout growing on the young, so very young man's face but he realizes he's never tried anything here and maybe he should. Is he meant to wait to be seated? Or? He's never been here alone. And then there's a guy with goat ears and little horns and Jeb practically vibrates in place! "Hey, Mister? Are you Mister Sh… Sheepbert? My brother, he's Jay Guthrie. He tells me all about you!" He says excitedly as soon as he spies him.

Lambert's nose is keen enough that a regular scent has him pricking his ears under that chef's hat as the familiarity comes back to him. Right now he is balancing four or so wooden bowls of wine - a traditional way of serving it - and passing them out with neat speed. For all his rolly polly bulk, he moves with great efficiency, and a certain sense of restrained agility. As keen as a mountain goat, indeed. His horns are quite small protrusions under his cap, but those looking will find them. Then he spots Jebediah and he gives him a broad smile "Come, come, sit at the communal table. No one else here at it yet, you have all the space to yourself!" When his lips part, his sharp teeth are visible.

"Ah, I know Jay Guthrie well - welcome. What's your name! And _mine_ is 'Lambert'," he says, touching his breast lightly "All about? I hope he told you about the food!"

Jebediah is /vibrating/ with excitement. He certainly hears Lambert offer him the communal table but was he listening? Absolutely not, instead, he was obsessing about what Jay's relayed to him about Lambert. "Jay says you have a tail! Do you have a fluffy tail? Can Ah look at your eyes? He says you have square ones like a goat does! My mama back home, used to have goats! They're really cool!" His questions and excited statements run a mile a minute. "Oh my /god/, Jay, he said you have fangs too, can Ah see 'em too?? Ah'm sorry for calling you the wrong name. Laaaambert, Ah like that! Mine is Jebediah but you can just call me Jeb."

"…" Lambert is honestly not quite sure how to handle a level of enthusiasm like this. Normally, it is Lambert being the bright, cheery one - so to be outdone takes some effort. He opens his mouth, he closes them, and then he pats the table gently "Sit down. Let's start with some wine and some…answers? Yes! I do have a tail - but I have my chef's whites on, and they cover it. Ahhh…yes. I do have square eyes." He leans in, to let Jebediah see. Lambert's pupils are indeed horizontal, though there is a faintly cloudy paleness over the darkness of them. His vision might not be so good.

Lambert laughs "I have fangs, yes. Satyr are mostly carnivores - though they drink a lot of wine, and eat grapes and wild berries. Sort of imagine a drunken bear, and you've got the right idea." He grins, and then he laughs "Yes, Lambert, like the sheepish lion. And…hello Jeb. No wings?"

It's the hand movement that makes Jebediah finally realize that Lambert wants him to sit but sitting my hold his questions in! He worries his lower lip as if this is a very serious decision to make and finally concedes to sit down, if only for fear that Lambert might not tell him anything else if he does. His mouth drops open in wonder when Lambert leans in to let him real look at his eyes. He pulls in an excited breath so sharply he nearly chokes on it and presses his hands together like he means to clap but decides against it last minute. "Say that again? Saaaytuh? What's that mean? Is that why you have the restaurant because you're really good at making wine? What does your wool feel like? Can Ah touch it? Did you know that yer really, really pretty?? Can Ah draw you some time? Ah really like to draw. Ah come here to meet my friend Mister Morbius and he's fun to draw too." It takes a full second for Jebediah to realize he's been asked a question. "Oh, no, Jay's way way way way way cooler than me. Ah just make electricity shoot out of my eyes. It's not beautiful like Jay's wings."

"Actually, yes, on the wine," admits Lambert, with an easy smile "Satyr - it's an old word. I'm only a quarter satyr. My grandfather can't pass for human at all. Neither can my father, really. Aren't you darling. Here." He reaches down to pull up a heavy pottery flask, with a beeswax and paper stopper, and then peels it back. He starts to pour, and he says "Oh, well, not quite like hair. But you can't touch it while I'm working - occupational health and safety, you know. I like to run a really clean kitchen, so I don't want to pull it out of my h-" Pretty? Lambert's eyes widen comically "You have amazing taste," he tells the man with an amused look. And then he says "Ah! Yes - he's very interesting isn't he. You make…electricity shoot out of your eyes. Goodness. Wait. How _much_…wait. Wow. I bet you could help restart someone's heart. Or go fishing and stun all the fish to the surface! Or help someone come out of a seizure. See? All of those things are cool!"

"Well, yeah, Ah do. Because Ah think you're really pretty and don't tell him, okay, but Ah think Mister Morbius is really pretty too. Ah don't think he'd appreciate 'pretty' probably somethin' more rugged like /dashingly gorgeous/" And here does a very bad impression of Morbius' accent. "But he's unique, and yer unique and /that's/ what makes you pretty. Ah like your eyes! Ah love them! And your horns! Yer so groovy!" He continues to excitedly pour compliments on the other man. He looks up at him with all the adoration a puppy might give any human stood close to it long enough. "Ah could maybe, Ah never tried the health things… Ah used it to explode a car once and.. burn somebody but just a little bit! Ah just wanted to scare them. Ah'm trying to be good now though. Ah use it to burn pictures into wood. It's really hard and Ah burn myself a lot but Ah give the pictures to my friends. Like Mister Morbius. Ah made him a moon once. He really liked it." He rocks a little back and forth, excitement coursing through his veins and not allowing him to sit still. "Wine is like your super power then! Besides looking /super cool/."

"Try 'dangerously alluring'," Lambert advises, for Morbius "He'd love that. He's a predator, and he likes to know that he's on top of the pecking order." He grins, interlacing his fingers, and then he lifts his hand "A moment!" A quick dash around - he can scamper fast! - and Lambert is back with fresh bread, oil, salt, olives, and a little grilled lamb meat. He spreads it out, and he laughs "Thankyou! I am different. I am not a true satyr - I am mostly human." His ears flick "Sometimes I think my horns will never grow in properly." Compliments, yes. He almost preens. Lambert has no self consciousness at all when it comes to nice things being said.

The chef then lifts his head up, and he waves a hand "You can do all kinds of things with electricity. Pshaw. These supernaturals and mutants - they think too narrow with their powers. I could find you a use for jut about anything." Lambert grins, and he says "My power is carousing - I can make alcohol in a couple of days. Whiskey in a week. I can make food, make love, make jokes. But…well, it works well being a restaraunter with this sort of thing. It isn't quite a power. It's a compulsion, I suppose."

"Ah.. Ah cain't actually tell Mister Morbius that Ah think he's real attractive though, Mister Lambert, because maybe he won't wanna talk to me no more and he's my only friend, really but Ah think next time he's really sad, Ah'll tell him that. It sounds nice, /alluring/." He mentally writes that down for 'things to do when Morbius isn't okay'. When Lambert returns with food, Jeb smiles widely. "You know, Mister Lambert, Ah've been here a lot but Ah ain't never had any food here, this will be the first time."

"Ah like them! Your horns. They might be small but bein' small doesn't make anything or anyone less amazing!" He continues to positively bathe the other man in compliments and Jeb's so damn sincere that it doesn't sound like flirting. It sounds like Jebediah is telling gospel truth over here. He tilts his head to the side, fascinated by Lambert's stories of alcohol making as well, though he flushes when Lambert mentions making /love/. "What does that word mean? 'Carousing?' Ah.. Ah don't have a lot of book learnin', sir."

"He's Greek, he understands that people can be overcome by beauty," opines Lambert, whether it is true or not. And he slides across a knife and fork "Why have you been here so many times without actually ordering food? What have you been looking for?" He moves across to sit down himself, with his own bowl of wine "I like my horns," he says, and he is grinning now, those sharp teeth showing. Lambert is - like most nymphs, satyrs, and maenads - not immune to flattery. And he laughs at the other man's blush, before he says "Carousing is the art of…I suppose, having fun with wine, song, good company. It involves performance - telling tall stories, singing, dancing. Everything like that. Drugs, wine. Delirients. You have to be lively! People need to be having fun around you!" He pauses, then he says "But I can't _force_ anyone to do it. It isn't like lightning from the eyes. All I can do is direct."

He's still flushed over the idea of telling Morbius how beautiful Jeb really thinks he is. "Ah think he might like to hear it, Ah don't think that he thinks he is, he thinks he's just a scary vampire but he's very beautiful and he has a good soul too. He's a very good man, Mister Morbius. Ah like him a real lot." Jeb admits with a smile. "Ah've just been here for Mister Morbius. Mister Morbius is always here when Ah wanna bother him, so Ah come and bother him. He's always got these little leaves stuffed with things. Ah've always wanted to try them."

"Drugs? Mister Lambert, drugs are bad for you. You shouldn't take them. Yer plenty lively by yerself, ain't ya?" Jeb says, flabbergasted by the idea of drugs being a part of Lambert's routine. "Ah practiced a lot with my eyes, because Ah never wanted to hurt anyone bad with it, so Ah practiced and practiced and Ah got really good." He holds out his burned hands for Lambert to look at it. "Ah'm still learning though. Ah could make you wood art, for the restaurant."

"Dolmades. I'll get you some from the kitchen," says Lambert, rising and nodding his head. He is swift about it, coming back out with the little vinewrapped pieces arranged. These ones have various cheeses, herbs, and mince inside with a little vinegar. Then he settles back down next to Jeb, and he says "Oh, that side is a ritual thing. Yes, they can be dangerous. I'd never do anything which would cause people trouble…" Whatever that means. Now he leans forward, and he takes Jeb's hands. His own are broad, the agile fingers thick with wide nails. He examines Jeb's fingers, and then he says "That would be good. I would like a burned picture of a vineyard in greece, if you could do it. Morbius is…sometimes here. He can be grim. He is a close friend."

Jeb takes one of the Dolmades eagerly, because he had always been curious about what Morbius loved them for. His eyes light up then roll back in pleasure as the tastes combine on his tongue and he makes a sound that is absolutely not suitable for public but this food was so good. "/Oh/, Mister Lambert.. Mister Lambert, this is amazing!" He practically moans once he's swallowed.

Then Lambert is holding his hands and /no one holds his hands/ and Jeb nearly blushes again. Hey, he did say he thought Lambert was pretty! Jeb's hands are littered with scars and burns, fresh and old, and there are plenty of little cuts along the skin there and up his arms that were nearly healed but not quite just yet. "Ah could do that, do you have a picture you like best? Ah could recreate it!"

The food is excellent - and since excellent food can seem almost supernatural in it's flair, this is no exception. Lambert laughs at the noise and the swallowing, and his ears flick back and forth under his cap. Off in the corner, the woman and her companion are finishing up for the night, ready to go home. Lambert himself yawns a little, and then he refills his own wine "Thankyou," he says gravely, with some amusement, and he tilts his head. Those eyes of his are canny, if clouded "What are the cuts from? You look like a chef, eh. Oh, yes, I do, absolutely. My grandfather's vineyard, on Mount Olympus. I have the photo. But it is the only one of it's kind, so I must get it back. Humans don't get to see this place."

It was obscene, the noise the food had inspired, but truly anyone trying Mediteranean food for the first time must respond the same way, Jeb's cheeks grow red after but he can't help the smile on his face. "Ah think Ah rather loudly paid my compliments to the chef." He teases. He pulls down on his sleeves after he's released to hide his injuries. "Ah got in a fight, and the guy, he exploded all the lights so Ah quick took my jacket off and threw it over him so the glass wouldn't hurt him, only it hurt me instead." He explains, sheepishly.

"Ah could come and look at it only here, then it never has to leave this place, ah could recreate it by sketch first and then take it home and recreate it on wood, then you wouldn't have to worry."

Lambert says "The man who exploded the lights - is his name Elmo?" He pours himelf a bowl of wine, and then he hesitates, for perhaps the first time "If you wouln't mind," Lambert says, slowly "I just don't feel so comfortable letting it too far out of my grasp, since I can never get another one. My grandfather didn't realise I had a camera, I don't think he actually knows what a camera is. But he fritzes technology out." He then waves a hand casually "Tell me more about yourself - and Jay. I like Jay. He's rather sweet, isn't he? Are all your family like this - good natured? Dionysis, honestly, the whole country could do with more of you."

Jebediah hesitates. If Lambert knows Elmo then he might like him and he might be upset that Jeb got in a fight with him, honesty is supposed to be the best policy though, so Jeb ducks his head like a scolded puppy and nods. "It is. Ah said a mean thing to him and he said a mean thing about my brother so Ah tried to shock him but that didn't work, then Ah punched him and all the lights exploded so Ah protected him. Ah never wanted him to get very hurt." He explains.

"Ah like my Jay too. He's a good brother and a great man, Ah hope one day Ah'm as good as he is." Jebediah says, he can easily gush about his brother all day. "He's a very kind man, very funny and charming, all the things Ah'm very.. not." He blushes when Lambert compliments him and waves him off. "No, no, just more of Jay! There's a lot of family, but Jay is absolutely the very best Guthrie there ever was."

Lambert says mildly "I'll rib him about it when I run into him again." He lifts the bowl to his lips "Don't look so worried there - trust me, satyrs end up fighting all the time. That's what our thick skulls are for - headbutting one another at high speed! So don't you stress too much about it all. Sometimes you need to shake it all out in a bit of a brawl to work out what's what." He snorts, in amusement, and he says "Was he back talking Jay? Ahhaha. I'm going to rib him so hard."

Lambert pushes his chef's cap off, and the hair on his head is full of tight, woolly curls. And it is pale, very, almost white, which looks startling against his very mcuh more tanned skin. Underneath, the ears are long, they look sort of elfin, but with a thoroughly furry back to them. The fur, too, is very pale. Lambert tilts his head, and he says "…but you two are clearly brothers. Why are you putting yourself down? I think Jay is a wonderful person. But…just because you don't have wings…"

"You fight? You're so charming and nice though. You have a hard skull? That's /really/ cool, Mister Lambert. Ah don't know why anybody would wanna fight you but that's a neat ability to have. Gives a whole new meaning to being hard headed, huh?" He says with a big smile. "And yeah, he bad talked Jay but he ain't mean it. He just wanted to make me mad. He don't like Mister Morbius either and Ah adore Mister Morbius so Ah don't like him for that reason either and Ah don't trust him to not hurt my brother."

Lambert's hair! Lambert's haaair! Jeb's mouth drops again and there's an audible 'ahhh' that escapes before he talks. "Mister Lambert, you are /stunning/. Yer hair is so beautiful! You look like yer cut from marble, like… like a /god/ but don't tell Jesus Ah said that. He'll tell my mama." The slender, young man is mesmerized by Lambert for a moment, that he nearly misses the question he's asked. "Oh… well… 'acause Jay is a good man. Ah make a lot of mistakes and Ah get in a lot of fights."

"All satyrs fight, more than nymphs, but not as much as maenads," says Lambert mildly "Oh! Don't worry about it - we're built for it. I can take one hell of a blow to the front of the head and be perfectly fine. And I get in trouble sometimes? Not badly. But you know how some purebred humans are - and since I look a little like a sheep, er…" He waves his hands casually, and then he says "…mmm. Well, your brother is a grown man. He can take care of himself! And so can Doctor Morbius - though he's been a bit poorly lately. He might like a visit. If I run into him, should I tell him you are looking for him?"

And then Lambert, for the first time, colours up "Er, please - it's fine, I know I like my food a bit too much." He pats his stomach, and then he says "But thankyou! I like having fleece too! But it can be kinda hard to find someone who can trim it properly." He reaches out, takes Jeb's hand, and puts it on his fleece. Which is a bit like touching a sheep with no oily lanolin. Lambert says "…why do you think that makes you not a good man? Everyone alive makes mistakes."

"Ah know Jay can take care of himself and Ah know that Mister Morbius can too but he.. he doesn't gotta do it all alone. That's why Ah'm here. Ah bring him things that make him smile and Ah talk to him and Ah tell him that he's not alone without saying that.. because Mister Morbius is very prideful and Ah don't want him to feel like Ah don't think he can handle everything by himself but Ah want him to know that so long as Ah'm around, he doesn't gotta." He explains, Jebediah clearly cares a lot for Morbius and for Jay. "And my brother, Mister Lambert, Jay Guthrie is my most favoritest person in the whole entire world. Ah love him more than anything else in the entire world, more than anything. He can take care of himself, it's true. He flew all the stinken way out here to New York to take care of himself.. without me. Ah know that he can but he ain't gotta. Ah'm his brother. We take care of each other. Is what family does."

Jeb looks down at Lambert's tummy and shrugs. "That ain't make you any less gorgeous, Mister Lambert." He insists and then Lambert guides his hand to his fleece and Jeb is more than happy to pet him with another little "Whooooa!"

"Ah.. Ah don't know, Mister Lambert… Ah mess up a lot. Ah used to start fights on purpose and make my poor mama fret and my brothers and sisters. Ah'm loud and annoyin'. Ah'm just… Ah'm not as good as Jay. Jay's so good, Lambert." He explains, insecurity clear in every word.

"He is _very_ prideful," agrees Lambert, without any rancour whatsoever. He drinks like a fish, putting away the alcohol easily, and he breathes in, and then he says "I have to. Ask. Jay and Elmo…aren't they usually close friends? Why would Elmo say something odd about Jay? Anyway. He did say he had a big family. I do, too." He frowns for a moment, but then he waves the idea of it away "Very well, I will not interfere. But maybe also Jay would like to take care of you. As families do." Lambert reaches out for a moment to still the flame, and it flickers. Then he watches Jeb, head tilted, possibly just a little amused, at the touch. Finally Lambert suggests "Don't compare yourself to him. Wouldn't he hate you saying such things, since I am sure he does love you. You have different skill sets, tht is all. I still start fights - or they start around me. Never mind. You are a different person."

"He ain't say it because he meant for it to get back to Jay, he did it to upset me because Ah came looking for a fight. They are very close. Jay was really sad when Ah told him what he said but Ah didn't tattle on him to the bar owner because Ah didn't want him to get kicked out when Ah started the fight. Ah think Jay probably had words with him by now. Elmo and Ah are both young and stupid, that's all." He explains. "Jay and Ah, we have eight more siblings. Two are older than both of us. Sam is the oldest, then Paige, then Jay, then Melody, /then/ me." He lists off for Lambert.

"He ain't say it because he meant for it to get back to Jay, he did it to upset me because Ah came looking for a fight. They are very close. Jay was really sad when Ah told him what he said but Ah didn't tattle on him to the bar owner because Ah didn't want him to get kicked out when Ah started the fight. Ah think Jay probably had words with him by now. Elmo and Ah are both young and stupid, that's all." He explains.

"Jay and Ah, we have eight more siblings. Two are older than both of us. Sam is the oldest, then Paige, then Jay, then Melody, /then/ me." He lists off for Lambert. "Then after me, there's Joelle, Elizabeth, Cissie, Lewis and Mary. So when he said a lot, he meant /a lot/."

Jeb has not stopped petting Lambert yet, still so fascinated by his wool. "You really are so.. so incredible, Mister Lambert, so soft. You and Jay could do a trade. Jay needs someone to fix his feathers for him, you need someone to help sheer your wool! Ah could teach you how to take care of his feathers." He says, still in awe by Lambert's mere existence. "Ah.. Ah'll try not to. Compare myself."

Lambert finally says "And I should not ask for anything else! So thankyou for humouring me - I like people to have pleasantries, and for people to feel a sense of relaxation." He lifts his head. The wool is warm "I could! But, ah," he coughs "I would not…I mean. I might suggest it to him. Though you can do it, eh? I suppose siblings learn to care for one another in that kind of environment. I get on with mine, but my horns are shorter, so I'm not very good at winning our contests. Plus I'm not as strong." He finally says "I kind of enjoy being young and foolish. Wow. That's a great amount of children - it would be fun if you all came together here sometime." Finally, though, Lambert is rising, glancing out at the now empty restaurant "I'm sorry to do this to you, Jeb, but I need to close up shortly. I have to be up in time to get the early morning fish market."

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